You Meet Destiny on the Road Taken to Avoid it
by CopperCaramel
Summary: Harry wonders about what could have been. Becoming obsessed completely, is there anything he can do to find out what would happen?  Pairings: HP/GW HP/DM
1. Chapter 1

**This story is a result of a very nice PM from an incredibly sweet person who complimented me on my writing :3**

**So therefore, this story is dedicated completely to _AshwoodDraven88_ in hopes of her finding a better boyfriend than that toss pot :) **

**Read, enjoy and please don't forget to review!**

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><p>Harry sat down heavily on the chunk of rock.<p>

It seemed to be a part of the Teachers' table, the one that until recently had sat at the head of the Great Hall.

Harry's head was swimming, the place was in tatters. His head ached as an aftermath of his 'death'. Ron was with his family - none of them were celebrating. Hermione was with Ron, fully accepted into the family as Ron's girlfriend. Voldemort was finally gone, Harry's quest in life - his duty - was complete. He was now 'The Saviour of the Wizarding World'.

But Fred, Fred was gone. So was Remus and Tonks. Even little Colin Creevey was dead.

Everyone - his parents, Sirius, Dumbledore, Snape, Cedric - all dead at the hands or orders of the Dark Lord.

And Harry hated it.

The good guys always win, yes that's true, but at a price that stories never seemed to include. They all died for the cause - The Greater Good - and it made Harry feel sick to even contemplate the fact he had lived through it all in spite of everything.

Harry was a survivor of a war he had hoped to stop and it gave him a heavy feeling of horridness in his gut. He should be in a pub somewhere drinking and celebrating but he was in the abandoned Great Hall mourning for what shouldn't have been. He felt so broken, so useless and so depressed. Thinking of the safety that the Wizarding World was now able to feel didn't make him feel anyway better; it made him feel worse. Worse that he hadn't secured a victory for the Good Side before everyone had been brutally murdered or changed beyond comprehension.

If only Voldemort had died before he had become the darkest wizard to grace the world. If only someone went back in time to kill him before he had killed almost everyone Harry held dear. _If only..._

-oOo-

Harry sat down at his desk, a desk marred with sheets of paper and scorch marks that were a result of his increasingly unstable temper. Harry knew he was obsessed. He knew that it was an unhealthy reason that had driven him to becoming an Unspeakable.

He had heard that the first step towards curing a problem is to admit that you have one and Harry had. He had a problem, he was obsessed since it had occurred to him realistically those three years ago back in the Great Hall, after that defeat of his nemesis Voldemort. He wanted to turn back time, turn it back so that he could murder the murderer and save the world in an entirely roundabout and secretive way.

He looked up at the sound of a door to see Zacharias Smith, his fellow Unspeakable enter the room. Smith wasn't someone Harry interacted with voluntarily if he could help it but Smith had an annoying tendency to seek Harry out for no apparent reason.

Harry didn't like the man at all. He hadn't forgotten his aloof and snide manner during their DA meetings and he hadn't forgotten the way he eyed Ginny like she was a piece of meat. Still he tolerated him with politeness and - unless he could pull an excuse out of a hat - he accepted the man's invitations for a drink.

The invitations that had become increasingly often. Smith had only been turned down two days ago in favour of helping Kingsley with his Aurors and he was already back with a request.

"Harry!" Smith said beaming at the dark haired man. "I was wondering if you would like to have some dinner with me? I've made a reservation at _Lumos_." Harry looked scandalized, "_Lumos_ is a gay bar, Smith!" He bellowed at the man rather scarily and his molten green eyes forced the man to back up a step.

The man turned white, "Potter, you and I both know there is no use in pussyfooting around. We're both men now, not the boys we once were."

Harry stood up, his headache reaching astronomical proportions. "Precisely, Smith. We are both men. I don't know about you but I do not swing that way!"

If Zacharias was white before he was practically colourless now. His extravagantly coiffed hair was wilting and washed out looking. "You aren't gay?" he asked hoarsely. He took a step back and sat trembling on a box of files. He had made the biggest fool of himself. The man he had been lusting after since the moment they had started with the DA - back in that dingy hovel _The Hog's Head._ Harry was the man who had made him realize he was gay.

Harry was also the one who he had childishly mocked since he had had a crush on him. Harry the completely straight man who he had just invited on a date to a gay bar.

Harry was taking pity on him now. "Uh no Smith, I'm with Ginny."

The man blinked rapidly, trying desperately to quell the need for tears that had spontaneously arisen. "Oh well, I'll see you around, Potter." And he left. With tears glinting in his eyes and his heart broken. He had finally accepted what he had shirked since he had met Harry face to face at DA. He was completely in love with Harry James Potter. A sad unrequited love that would haunt him until the end of his days.

Harry let him go, thinking that it was ironic two people had walked away from a date with him saying "See you around". Although he had wanted to go on that date with Cho, any sort of romantic outings with Zacharias Smith were definitely a negative. He sighed tiredly and went back to his desk, flicking through an enormous book that proclaimed to be an complete encyclopaedia on Time-Travel and it's varying forms.

The entire book was dry and filled with fluffed up nonsense. Harry had worked out a few theories from between the fluff and had a few new ideas that might just work out. If he ever got finished with the experiments on magically changing the curses on cursed objects to the opposite. It was a thankless task, there was no real reason for doing it but what the Minister said needed to be done had to be done.

He was researching Time-Travel outside his working hours, heck he was researching it when he wasn't working or sleeping. Even during the time Hermione banished his books from his reach he mulled over ideas, forming new ones and tinkering with failed ones.

Ron thought he was barmy; he and Ron hadn't spoken properly in months. He was far too preoccupied with his need to kill Voldemort when the freak was a kid to pay attention to his mates. Even his relationship with Ginny was suffering. She was admittedly a Professional Quidditch Player and travelling with the Holyhead Harpies a lot of the time but even so, he should really make an effort when he did see her.

He ran a hand through his hair - probably the thousandth time he had that day - and read blearily though the chapter on the mechanics of Time-Travel. Hermione was expecting him for dinner at eight; he had two hours until then.

-oOo-

Harry looked into the mirror in Ron and Hermione's bathroom.

His trademark messy, uncontrollable hair was worse than it usually was. His bright green eyes were weary, hours in front of his books leaving them red, itchy and strained. His glasses were sitting crookedly on his nose, something that happened five minutes after he fixed them without fail. His face was prematurely lined, reminding him of Lupin with a sharp pang of sadness. If only he could get him back.

He splashed a little water on his face and studied the mirror once more. His face was tanned from hours spent helping Aurors on their wild adventures out foreign. Harry was always the one who went out foreign with the Auror Department. Just as he was the only one who they turned to for back-up.

Even amongst the elite Aurors Harry outshone them. His duelling skills were unrivalled even by those of Dumbledore - should the man be alive. Kingsley had begged him to request a transferral from Unspeakable to Auror but so far his pleading was ignored. Harry wanted to turn back time and the Department of Mysteries was the place to find out how.

He sighed, straightened his glasses and wandered back to Ron and Hermione's kitchen.

His two best friends had married each other at the age of nineteen. Harry couldn't find any fault with the idea even though they were young. They had known each other for eight years at the time so they knew the quirks of the other and could accept it.

They were twenty now. How fast time had passed.

They looked up from a letter as Harry entered, suspiciously stopping their conversation. Ron folded the letter and shoved it in his pocket with a strained smile at Harry. They weren't really best friends any more, Harry realized with a growing feeling of horror. Harry had pushed them out, leaving only his obsession and a mutual feeling of love towards the man and his wife.

Hermione hurriedly began to dish out the dinner she had made, the mouthwatering scent reminding Harry like a smack in the face that he hadn't eaten since breakfast two days previous. She had taken lessons from Mrs Weasley and was now an accomplished cook, just like her mother-in-law.

"Harry," she said warmly. "Take a seat, I've made a chicken casserole. Ron adores it, more than he does me!" Harry flicked a glance at Ron, watching him stare at Hermione with an expression that showed he was hopelessly in love with the woman standing mere feet away from him.

Harry sat and grinned at them. It was so long since he had smiled that he wasn't sure his face would hold the strain. "Hey Ron, fancy a game of chess later?" he said, the smile was hurting his cheeks but he relished the pain. It meant he was moving forward. Ron's head whipped around, goggling at Harry with amazement. He suddenly smiled back and everything was as it had been when they were at school and Harry had his best friend. It felt great, the warm feeling spreading through his chest loosening a knot of hopelessness that Harry hadn't even realized was there.

They tucked in to their meal; chattering more freely that they had since before the war. Harry watched his friends covertly as the meal went on. He hadn't witnessed their happiness together in a very long time.

-oOo-

He had done it! Finally finished with the device that would bring him back to kill Tom Marvolo Riddle.

And it was all because he had made up with his friends and stopped being so taken with the idea. He had still been obsessed, but no way as bad as he had been before the thing was complete.

He could turn back years, finally a little tinkering with your basic time turner and he was ready to go!

Hermione wouldn't be told - Ron either. Ginny, well he would leave a letter for her back at the house encase he didn't come back for some reason. All he had to do was a little research on dates and he would be perfectly fine. The time turner - his upgraded one - would be able to take him back in time and then forward to present day.

He was going to have his parents back! And Fred, Sirius, Remus, Tonks, Dumbledore - heck even Snape! He wondered what it would be like to be held by his mother. What playing Quidditch with his Dad would be like? Whether Sirius would get married and then Harry could have a perfectly nice cousin. Unlike Dudley, although Harry hadn't heard from him since before The Battle of Hogwarts.

For a few moments before he left, he paused in his preparations. This was it and he was beginning to feel a niggling doubt at the back of his mind. What if it all went wrong? What happens if another evil wizard rises to take Voldemort's place? What if Harry, facing the young Tom Riddle couldn't pluck up enough blackness in his soul to finally kill someone? Kill a _child_ in cold blood?

He shook the doubts away - he could do this. Voldemort had started in Hogwarts in 1938. So if Harry went back to 1935 and killed the boy, Dumbledore won't have visited him yet and he wouldn't know he was a wizard.

It was 2001. Harry needed to go back sixty-six years. Back to when Voldemort was a boy of only nine years. Harry hated planning the end of a boy who had had no chance to live but that was the way of things. If he went back and killed him there would be a lot less evil in the world. He took a deep breath, he was trying to convince himself to go. It was something he had worked so hard at, he would hate if he didn't go through with it because of a few jittery nerves suddenly popping up from nowhere.

Maybe he would go and see his mother first, see how she was when she was young and carefree - something Harry had never had the luxury of. With that in mind, he made his way to the Atrium at the Ministry and proceeded to apparate home.

-oOo-

Ginny was there. Sitting on the couch wearing one of his t-shirts and her pyjama shorts.

"Gin?" he said cautiously. He hadn't been expecting her back for quite some time, she was supposed to be touring somewhere in Norway just then. He sat his wand on the dresser and moved towards her.

Ginny stood up and stalked towards him. It was the exaggerated hip sway he didn't understand, Ginny in all his years knowing her had never done that. "Harry," she practically purred, "Come make love to me."

She looked him in the eyes then, just like she did every time she hinted towards them getting involved. She took out her wand, the darkness in the sitting room made everything seem surreal. A tingle went up his spine and Ginny continued to take off his robes and shirt. He suddenly needed to kiss her more than anything else. "Gin," he murmured and pulled her mouth up to his.

The kiss was harsh, passionate and pulled Harry in until he felt like he was drowning in her mouth. It was nothing like the way his Ginny usually kissed but it felt nice. Arousing.

He pushed his hands into her hair as they practically grappled one another for dominance. It was rough, terribly rough but in a strange way it was exciting. It felt wrong, like he wasn't kissing Ginny at all. But he opened his eyes and met hers, her warm brown eyes that were alive with a strange fire he hadn't seen in them before.

Harry heard a slight click, one that was so like the way Ginny's knee cracked that it dispelled all his doubts about this actually being his darling. She grabbed him again, kissing and nipping at his lips before drowning him again with her mouth. It was a deep kiss, slower than the frantic pace he had been going at. A kiss that spoke of love in massive volumes.

There was a sharp intake of breath from his right and he wasn't bothered to look and see Hermione or Ron after catching him and Ginny kissing yet again.

He kept kissing her for a long minute, even as their unwanted observer came forward and pulled at him. He couldn't hear anything over the roaring buzzing silence. It seemed someone had cast muffliato on him!

Ginny drew a breath through her nose - doubtlessly having heard her brother or sister-in-law. She felt different however. Her mouth became wider, lips thinner, her hair was short. She also grew so Harry was the shorter one.

He tried to pull back forcing her away from him, but her muscular arms knotted in the effort of holding him against her mouth - against her chest. Her chest that lacked breasts.

Harry - his mind blown by the thought - realized it wasn't a Ginny he was kissing, it wasn't even a she. He fully concluded that he was kissing a man. And so his struggles turned desperate, frantic in their need to escape the embrace of the male stranger now kissing him.

Harry was useless without his wand, it was where he had placed it on the dresser.

The man yelped, a result of a stinging hex thrown by the person who had finally thought of using magic against the man instead of trying brute force. Merlin bless Ron or Hermione or whoever it was!

He pulled away finally, gagging and retching. It was a good job he hadn't eaten yet. He bent double, clutching his stomach as the dry heaves turned to sobs. Why did some freaky man have to fancy him enough to get Ginny's hair so they could kiss him?

There were arms falling over his shoulders, drawing him gently forward. Harry pushed away blindly and raised his head to see who it was.

Ginny.

Really Ginny this time, he'd recognize that look in her eyes anywhere.

Nevertheless he had been fooled once that night, he wouldn't be again. "What tattoo does Ron have?" he asked Ginny.

She smiled, that endearing smile that dimpled her cheeks and made her face soften dramatically. She understood the need for secrecy on the subject seemingly so she leaned forward and whispered so the other person in the room had no chance of hearing what she was saying.

"Ron has a pygmy puff - but I didn't say where."

His remembrance of the comment made her smile sadly. Harry crawled forward and dumped himself in her arms, harsh breaths like sobs still making their way through his mouth.

Ginny held him and did her best to comfort the man she had loved since she was ten. It was a long time - dare she say it - almost an obsession for a while but still she realized at the end of the day, she loved Harry completely and unchangingly, always...

Harry stood finally, looking down at the glaring, bound body of Zacharias Smith. Oh how he loathed that man.

He smirked - almost evilly - and reached down and dragged the man into an upright position. With a final burning glance towards Ginny, he apparated to the Ministry to hand over his co-worker to Kingsley.

-oOo-

Ginny was in bed when Harry finally got back.

He paused at her side of the bed and dropped a kiss onto her forehead, "Why are you back early, Gin?"

"Smith sent me a letter saying you wanted to see me tonight."

Harry laughed uneasily, "I still don't know how he got in through my wards."

Ginny chuckled warmly, gazing at her boyfriend with a loving, slightly exasperated face. "Harry dear, don't you remember the project he came over to try out with you? The one that destroyed the _entire_ sitting room?"

The dawning realization on Harry's face was adorable. She couldn't believe how childlike he still was despite the notorious reputation of Unspeakables.

Harry slipped in between the sheets on his side of the bed, "Oh yeah," he said shaking his head slightly, " Bloody git."

He leant in to share a kiss with Ginny and tension that he hadn't known about melted away.

She kissed like you were the only person in the world. All passion but gentle. Her kissing was just like her fiery but gentle, loving. He sighed happily and they relaxed together, bodies moulding around each other.

She cuddled as close as she could get and interwove their limbs together.

"I love you, Gin." Harry said sleepily just as his consciousness was fading.

"I love you too, Harry." She replied, almost shocked that she meant it completely.

With Harry and her, the feeling that they were only together because it was expected was strong. She realized, clamped in his arms, that she wasn't with him because of some unofficial or unspoken organized relationship. She was with him because he was Harry James Potter, the courageous and daring-to-the-point-of-stupidity Unspeakable. A Gryffindor through and through. He was a closet romantic and she had often awoken to roses or a breakfast in bed with toast that was charmed to have 'I Heart You' toasted darker on to them. She loved him because of him, not because he was The-Boy-Who-Lived or some such nonsense.

He was_ her_ Harry.


	2. Chapter 2

**Read, enjoy and please don't forget to review!**

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><p>When he awoke, Ginny's face was pressed into his neck. His arms were locked tightly around her and their legs were linked together.<p>

He extracted himself awkwardly and dressed quickly. He wasn't going to wake Ginny.

As he dashed back in after getting breakfast, he seen her curled up innocently on the bed. It melted his heart and he wondered if he should go. It wasn't as if they hadn't learned to cope without the people gone, it might just mess up everything.

He steeled himself, this was the right thing to do! He would save his parents and thousands of other people. Thinking this made his heart ache a little. He picked up his papers from the desk and went to work.

-oOo-

Standing alone at his desk, ready to go was possibly the most excited and dreaded moment of his life. Excitement won out in the end and Harry lifted the time turner, intent on taking himself back. Far back.

He had made sure that his robes were purposely old fashioned and that he wasn't wearing anything that might give him away as being a modern person.

Finally he picked up a piece of paper and shoved it into his pocket, took a deep breath and counted out thirty-two turns of his time turner. He would go back to 1969, the year his mother met Severus Snape. The boy who became her best friend and consequently her enemy. The man who had loved her his entire life, only for her to be taken away by Harry's own father and Snape's worst enemy.

On the thirty-second turning of the time turner, Harry stopped the device and felt the strangeness of the time travel. All around him people moved in a fast motion, one that was significantly faster than a normal time turner due to the amount of time travelled back.

He was glad to have the invisibility cloak. Nobody would see him that way.

Harry made his way down to the Atrium and out onto the street. The air was less muggy, it was raining slightly and Harry felt free. For the first time in a long time he was free of the burden of creating the time turner and he had finally finished mourning those who died - those he hadn't let go until that very moment.

He knew that if he went back to the present, he would be perfectly fine and able to live with their deaths and get on with his life but he didn't dare. He had gotten that far, he might as well finish it.

Harry held the name Spinners End in his mind, heedful of the Apparating Coordinates he had looked up earlier and apparated to the only safe spot there. Only to come face to face with a sallow, stingy boy with lank greasy hair and a face that looked bitter.

"Who are you?" the boy asked, not fazed that someone just appeared in thin air. Harry drew a breath. He was looking at the young Severus Snape.

"Walter," Harry stuttered out, "Uh, Walter Horne." Harry hadn't a clue where he plucked the name from but the training he had done with the Auror Department had paid off. He could lie seamlessly and without any sort of give away.

"I'm here to see Lily Po- ah, Lily Evans."

Snape narrowed his eyes then a sudden ray of comprehension dawned on him. "Are you here to formally tell her and her parents that she's a witch?" he asked eagerly. Harry nodded, unsure of what else to do.

"I'll take you to her, we're meeting up anyway in a half an hour."

Harry drew a breath. He could see it clearly in Snape's face that he was completely in love with his mother. It wasn't as terrible a revelation as he had expected it to be. He shrugged off all thoughts of the future and followed the young boy down the avenue and towards his mother. His mother that was eleven years younger than him.

"Lily!" Snape called out to Harry's mother.

The girl spun, hair whipping out in a veil behind her. She was so _alive_ it make Harry's throat hurt. Harry stepped forward and nodded to her respectfully. "Hello Lily," he said.

Lily approached him eyes trained on his with a curious expression. "Who are you?" she asked. Her voice was just a feminine version of Harry's. He saw the eyes that everyone spoke of. Exactly the same.

Tears threatened. He needed to relieve the burning of the lump in his throat but he couldn't. "I'm Walter, from the Ministry. I'm just here to see your magic."

Lily smiled brightly. "Look what I can do!" she said gesturing him closer and he got to experience first hand his mother making the petals of a lily open and close. Harry cleared his throat as she looked at him for praise. "It's beautiful," he managed to say. Maybe it was the raw emotion in his eyes, or the quavering note in his voice but his mother stepped forward and hugged him. "Thank you Walter."

He hugged her back. Just a quick squeeze and released her. This galvanized him into going back to kill Tom Riddle.

Harry coughed and said loudly, "Well I must be going, nice to meet you Lily. I'm sure you'll be one of the best witches the world will have ever seen."

With that he strode off, back to the apparition point to go to London.

-oOo-

The orphanage was just a bleak and gloomy as the time Harry had seen it in Dumbledore's memory. The only difference was that an old fashioned Muggle ambulance was pulled up outside.

A body was carried down the steps and past Harry. It was a tiny girl, her face contorted in fear. Her face was frozen, unmoving. She was dead.

Harry performed a complex weaving pattern over the body, murmuring an enchantment under his breath as he did. Then he sighed deeply. The girl had been killed with dark magic, Voldemort had struck already.

Harry, dizzy from the thought that a nine-year-old could kill another child.

Tom Riddle was in his room, a rabbit on his knees twitching. Voldemort was snarling over it, "_Yessss, it hurtssss, doesssn't it_?" It took Harry a few moments to realize that he was speaking Parseltongue to the animal.

He removed his cloak and pointed his wand at Voldemort, poised to attack.

Harry was teetering on the edge of purposely killing someone and it felt disgusting.

Tom Riddle looked Harry in the eyes, his glinting maliciously.

"And who are you?" he demanded with the air of a spoilt child instead of an orphan who had nobody to take care of him.

Harry was pulled in by the eyes. They were so evil, so completely full of hatred that Harry almost recoiled. "I am the cause of your death." Harry said and it was true. Whether Harry killed him now or killed him in the future he still would be the one to kill him.

Riddle sneered, "I can do things. Make people hurt if I want to." And then Harry felt an excruciating pain explode within him. It seemed worse than the Cruciatus, though maybe that was the fact it was a nine-year-old boy performing it on him.

The minute the pain was released, Harry looked Tom Riddle in the eyes again. "Avada Kedavra," he groaned and the flash of green light killed the boy before him, taking with it Harry's stellar record and lending him a horrified feeling that he had actually murdered a defenceless - nearly defenceless - boy. He apparated to the Ministry, locked himself in the bathroom and spun the time turner sixty-six times counter-clockwise, going forward in time instead of back.


	3. Chapter 3

Instead of back.

Why the name of Merlin's most saggy pants had he gone back?

Everything was different. Harry had been born a few years later than before and was only in his last year at Hogwarts. His last year at Hogwarts where he was Head Boy, a guy who abuses his position and, worst of all, a Slytherin. Harry James Potter was a Slytherin and best friends with a foul git known as Draco Malfoy.

He could remember the life he had left behind, thankfully. But memories of the life he was about to end up living was there now and funnily enough he knew what had happened throughout his whole life there. It had to be a side effect of the time travel, when you go forward years it would obviously change a lot and so the defence mechanism must be to provide you with full knowledge of who you are in the time you're in.

He was currently in the Slytherin boys dormitories with Draco, Pansy and Blaise Zabini.

They were studying for NEWTs. Slytherin-Harry got up to go to the toilet and vanished as soon as he saw Normal-Harry. It took a moment for the shock to subside then Harry realized that he was meant to take over and enter his role as Harry Potter, Slytherin and complete git.

-oOo-

As soon as Pansy and Blaise left, Malfoy relaxed and turned to Harry, "I don't know why we even bother to keep friends. You're company enough for me."

Harry shrugged, "Might come in useful." Draco looked extremely different when he wasn't sneering. Right now he was smiling widely at Harry, eyes losing their cold glare and burning with some strange emotion Harry couldn't place. They didn't seem like grey eyes when he had taken off his Malfoy-Mask, they seemed silver.

"That is why you're a Slytherin, not a Gryffindor."

"Oh shut up!" Harry said, falling into this version of Harry Potter with ease.

"No! You told me that the Sorting Hat was going to put you in Gryffindor, I'm just saying while you're really brave and all that ridiculous tosh, you are very sly and ambitious."

Harry stuck his tongue out childishly at Draco; it almost felt nice to be his friend. He knew he wasn't friends with Ron or Hermione. He hadn't spoken to Ginny more than a passing sly insult. Ron and Hermione didn't speak to each other either. The Golden Trio had never existed. Loony Lovegood was for mocking, Neville was just a snivelling coward and Severus Snape seemed to be his mother's friend and his favourite teacher.

-oOo-

Harry paced by his bed.

The Slytherin dorms were creepy. They were creepy and cold.

Merlin he wanted to go back to the life he had left, it was like a burning feeling of shame and guilt.

He decided as soon as he met his parents he would make a decision. All he had to do was play along as friends with Malfoy - simple enough - and get home.

His studies for the NEWTs were simple. As an Unspeakable slash unofficial Auror he was very competent at Defence Against the Dark Arts, Transfiguration and Charms. He was all right at Potions and Herbology, not amazing but he reckoned he would be able to secure an Outstanding, or at the very least Exceeds Expectations.

As a student Slytherin-Harry Potter was awful. He was bright and well able to achieve higher marks but he didn't bother. He and Draco skivved off a lot of their classes in favour of flying.

Harry was also a Seeker for Slytherin - something he would never have expected to see, not in a million years. With a great sigh, he plopped down on his bed only to alert Malfoy to the fact he was awake.

"Harry?" the said Slytherin whispered across the dorm. "Yeah?" he replied in an answering whisper. Draco huffed and appeared in his silk night gown - green obviously. "You should have told me you were awake you git! We were supposed to sneak out but you didn't mention it so I thought you didn't want to!"

Harry turned to him, glasses flashing as they caught the light of one of the floating candles. "Sneak out?"

Draco groaned, "I should have known you would have forgotten. It's Saturday, you oaf. We're going out for a _wandering_." Wandering. _Wandering?_ It suddenly clicked. The phrase was something he and Draco had uttered every Saturday since Third Year. The sly way Draco pronounced it had alerted him to the fact it was something more than a walk.

He and Draco were unregistered animagi. Draco a lithe leopard and Harry a lion much to Draco's continuous amusement. The Slytherin prodigy was a lion animagus, how quaint.

Harry ducked his head in shame, suddenly understanding the odd restlessness that had overcome him all day that had kept him pacing and the pointed looks Draco threw him all day.

"Salazar," he breathed, the irony of the fact he was using Slytherin's founder instead of Gryffindor's did not escape him. "I can't believe I forgot. I guess I've been caught up with studying for the NEWTs."

Draco grumbled, "Are you going to come with me while I check on the potion first?" Harry racked his brain to find out what the potion was. It was a Memory Potion. It enhances the the drinker's memory and Draco was planning to use it for the NEWTs.

"Drake, I don't think we should brew that." Harry said, face twisted with the awfulness of the idea. Draco froze on his way through the doorway. "You don't think we should brew it?" Draco asked his voice deadly calm and low. Harry shook his head lips twisting into a grimace, "It's not right, Drake."

"Har, you were the one who suggested it. It wasn't terrible when you were getting me to brew that poison that would murder that guy who wanted to rat you out to Dumbledore." Draco's voice was accusing, awful. Harry drew a breath and wondered who the boy was.

He was suddenly confronted by an image of a boy whom he knew as Oliver Wood, writhing and twisting as the potion killed him, slowly, painfully and exhilaratingly. To Slytherin-Harry anyway. The real Harry felt disgusted, horrified and disgraced. He couldn't believe he had planned and executed that idea. It was horrible, he was becoming the next Voldemort.

Harry trailed behind Draco then, the only person that Slytherin-Harry actually liked. The only one in the entire world including his parents. His awful parents who didn't understand him. Draco was his best friend, brother and _lover?_

Wait what? It was scary to think about. He and Draco were more than best friends, they were lovers. Lovers of the extremely secret kind, nobody knew about them but they did. Draco wasn't repulsed by the things Slytherin-Harry did or wanted to do - they loved each other.

It was so strange a thought, so repulsive that he almost choked.

Draco was by his side in an instant, "Har, are you all right?" He nodded and clawed his way to an upright position, twisting away from Draco awkwardly and blushing. Draco nodded forlornly, "Har, c'mon. We'll forget about the potion. You need to get out and have a run around. Did you bring that cloak of yours?"

Harry nodded and swung the cloak around them, feeling uncomfortable with being so close to Draco.

They reached the grounds without seeing a single person, alive or dead. Harry slipped off the cloak as soon as they reached the Forbidden Forest, stuffing it into a bag he conjured and leaving it hidden beneath a bush with a marker to let him know where it was.

Draco smiled at him. It was an unguarded smile full of undisguised affection and lust. Harry, with a burn in his cheeks, felt a matching smile plaster across his face unconsciously. It was reminding him he was playing in dangerous waters, that he was under the influence of the memories of Slytherin-Harry. Draco closed the space between them and placed a gentle kiss on Harry's lips, leaving him glued to the spot unable to move.

Draco then kissed him hungrily and, to Harry's immense disgust and Slytherin-Harry's intense euphoria, Harry kissed him back. They stood, hands wandering freely for a few minutes, the connection between their mouths not breaking until breathing became necessary. Draco rested his head on Harry's chest, both panting harshly, trying to regain their breaths. Harry was struggling to come to terms with the fact he had just willingly kissed a guy for the first time. It had been like nothing he had ever experienced with Ginny. If Harry's pride had been shredded from the kiss like his hatred towards Draco, he would have admitted to himself that it had been incredible. Any anonymity he had felt towards Draco from his original life was gone just like that. The passion he felt for the man had in the other life been channelled towards him as hate. In this one he had admitted his attraction and honed that into love.

Draco finally lifted his head and blinded Harry with a smile, "Ready?" Harry nodded and allowed himself to change into his animal form. His bones bending and muscles stretching and bunching. It was an odd sensation but one Harry welcomed.

He looked over to where Draco had stood to see a snow white leopard, advancing on him playfully. Harry allowed him to wrestle with him for a few minutes before pinning him to the ground and licking the leopard's face. It squirmed and Harry let it go, racing with it through the forest.

They spent hours in the forest, even as the light grew and the sun made it's way across the sky. Harry couldn't think of a time he had ever felt freer. He gambolled towards Draco in the clearing they had marked as their own, growling softly trying to tell him he was hungry. His stomach rumbled loudly alerting the other being to his hunger and Draco changed to his human form. Harry followed in suit and sat on the floor of the forest facing the man who his entire school life seemed to centre upon in this life and the other.

"Hungry Har?" Draco asked with a smirking grin. Harry pouted, "Come on, Drake. I'm famished. We missed dinner last night studying, breakfast this morning and lunch as well. You're going to have to make up for that." He astonished himself with his flirtatious words but Draco seemed used to them and threw Harry a saucy smile, "How do you propose I do that then?"

Harry swallowed sharply, not understanding what was coming over him. "Dunno, Dray." His voice was hoarse and suddenly a problem cropped up in his trousers. One that Draco's eyes zoned in on immediately. Draco licked his lips, though had you asked him he would have been prepared to swear on his life that he hadn't.

Harry couldn't honestly see any good coming out of any sexual encounter with Draco bloody Malfoy so he smiled tightly, stood up and said shakily, "Best get back to the castle then, yeah?" Without waiting for an answer, he turned into a lion and loped through the forest intent on running away from all his confused feelings and away from Draco the vain, supercilious git that had haunted more dreams of Harry's than he could count - seemingly in both lives.

-oOo-

"You're a git." Draco proclaimed loudly in the kitchen after stuffing himself with all sorts of food he ordered from the house elves.

Harry squinted over at him, glasses in his hand as he cleaned the lenses. "Why's that then?" he asked, not really bothered by the name calling. He pushed his glasses back onto his face, Draco's coming back into focus.

"You knew about the kitchen and you never brought me!" Draco said clambering over to Harry and seating himself in his lap. "I've starved plenty of times and you never brought me!"

Harry kissed his cheek softly, forcing himself not to think of the repercussions the act would wage on him. Draco melted into him, relaxing and stroking one of the tanned forearms Harry had wrapped around his waist. "I suppose I can forgive you," Draco said reluctantly, turning and pursing his lips for a kiss. Harry swallowed but complied, feeling just as swept away by this one as he had the last. Draco released him just as he thought he would explode and sank back into his lap with a self satisfied smile.

"I love you Har," Draco mumbled and froze. He suddenly sprang upwards out of Harry's arms and to his feet, blushing like a Weasley's hair. It wasn't something the two boys had ever said to one another and Draco was ripping himself apart that he would be so stupid as to say it.

Harry was caught in a corner. On one hand he had been thinking of proposing to Ginny not that long ago but on the other what he had with Draco was something infinitely more. With a prickling in his eyes, Harry said hoarsely, "I love you too, Dray."

Draco turned to face him with an incredulous expression. "You do?" he asked, a million times more frightened than he had been before Harry said it back encase it was a cruel joke.

Harry grimaced and turned his tear laden green eyes on Draco. Eyes that were filled with love and honesty. "Yeah, you git, I do."

Draco launched himself at Harry and brought their lips together once more with a crash of fumbling, awkward lips. It wasn't as perfect as the ones in the forest. Those were calculated and lusty. This one was painful, full of bleeding gums and swollen lips but it was loving. A desperate love like both expected the other to withdraw their claims of love.

When they parted, Draco threw himself into Harry's arms and hugged him with a backbreaking force.

Harry pulled back and looked into Draco's silvery grey eyes, so unlike Ginny's warm brown ones. Draco's pointy features were softened by the slightly too long hair that brushed his neck - just how Harry liked it.

His eyes burned, his throat closed up and all that escaped was a quiet throaty murmur of, "Dray..."

He knew with unrelenting certainty that this life was an awful one and that he needed to go back and change it but he couldn't bear to part with this _feeling_ he felt with Draco as, well as boyfriends he supposed. He knew that any sort of relationship with Ginny was out of the question. He wouldn't be able for it after feeling true love.

It was the right thing to do though. With a sudden revelation, he realized exactly what Remus had been trying to do when he left Tonks alone. He too would have to leave Draco so that his rising as the new Dark Lord was prevented. He said a silent goodbye in his head and tried to savour the time he had with Draco.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: ****AshwoodDraven88 is brilliant, best of luck getting better from your tailbone accident :3**

**I also just want to mention (**_for any Slytherins that might read this_**) I have nothing against Slytherins. I just presume that's the way Harry would feel if he ended up finding out he was a Slytherin!**

**Finally, are you guys surprised by that chapter?  
>I was shocked, and I wrote it :3<br>Lemme know! :D **

**Sláinte!**

~**ShazzaBlack**_...x_


	4. Chapter 4

Christmas was mere days away and Harry was oddly enough staying at Hogwarts.

Draco was eyeing him worriedly, "Har, you aren't still working on that plan, are you?"

Harry frowned and faced Draco from the fireplace he had been pacing in front of, "Which plan?"

Draco's lips curved for a moment, he knew Harry - Slytherin-Harry - was always planning something. "The one to get rid of your parents."

Harry gasped, he had been trying to murder his own parents! "No way!" he said firmly. Draco's eyes relaxed from their worried expression and he stood and hugged Harry swiftly, "Good."

He looked deeply into Harry's eyes, "You've changed recently. You're nicer, happier but more reserved with me. I like the nicer bit, some of the things you had done were truly horrid but I hate you not talking to me. You're more than my best mate, Har, you know that."

Harry drew back from the embrace and blushed lightly, "Yeah Dray, I know." Draco looked into his eyes once more and nodded finally. "I want you to know that I love you. I do Har, it's not something that will change from your confessing something."

Harry stared, pondering for a moment. He was going to be leaving anyway, why not tell him? "Dray," he began, trailing off to let him know he wanted to tell him something.

"Go on."

"I know I've been acting different lately and that's because I am different. I was Harry Potter in Gryffindor but I went back in time to kill a dark wizard that had corrupted your family and I ended up being a bad person. It's horrible."

Draco frowned at him, "You changed time in a big way?" Harry nodded. "Well you should go back and fix it. Since you ended up a good person you should just stop yourself from changing it."

Harry's lips formed a grimace of sadness. Tears pricked his eyelids, "I nearly had a wife back there. You hate me and, even though I've fallen for you now, I hated you too. My parents are dead. So is Sirius, Remus, Fred Weasley, Tonks, Dumbledore and Snape. There are hundreds of others dead too."

Draco took Harry's face between his hands, looking deeply into his eyes. "You listen to me Harry Potter. I love you and if it means you don't turn into an evil man I want you to go back. Go back and leave me because as long as it's someone else and not you that's doing the killing, I don't care who's dead."

His eyes watered. Draco had tears trailing down his cheeks. Gently they pressed their lips together for just one last time and Draco pulled away.

"Go and ask Dumbledore can he floo you home. You'll want to see your parents once before you leave." His voice cracked on the word leave, the rest of the sentence barely understandable through his tears. Harry nodded and went to fetch his cloak before leaving Draco and the love they might have had.

It was a cold walk to McGonagall's office. Made even worse by the taunting of Peeves on the way.

-oOo-

He was a bastard to his parents.

A complete and utter git that didn't care about them in the slightest. Slytherin-Harry hated them and their Gryffindor morals.

He broke down as soon as he seen them.

They were so happy together, so absolutely carefree and happy. James and Lily Potter weren't affected by the wrath of Voldemort, they weren't sad and they certainly weren't dead.

And Sirius was there too.

He stepped forward and pulled Sirius into a bear hug, hoping to convey how much he loved his godfather. How amazing it felt to be back in his godfather's arms. It seemed like a betrayal that he had missed Sirius slightly more than his parents but he supposed that was because he hadn't met them.

His parents were delighted, "You've matured, Harry dear." Lily was holding him in a hug and his father squeezed his shoulder proudly. Harry couldn't possibly tell them he was their Harry from a different life! He couldn't tell them that if he hadn't come along their son would be plotting to kill them. How would you even begin to explain it?

"I knew you were a good man, Potter," James said cheekily to his son. Harry laughed and sat chatting with the people he had never known.

He found he was rather like his mother in nature. His father was sharper and slightly mean but Lily was like him. With a temper but the sweetest person you could ever know the rest of the time.

Sirius was exactly the same as ever only happier and slightly less mature. He was engaged to Marlene McKinnon, his father's cousin and would definitely be a part of the family then. Marlene was pregnant too, about to have the first of many cousins.

-oOo-

Harry wasn't sure he could live without seeing Draco just once more.

Sure he'd see Malfoy in the future but Draco, his _Dray_! He needed to see him just once before he left.

He wrapped himself in his cloak and made his way out into the night. Draco would be the last to see him, Harry couldn't possibly go on without one last hug, one last kiss to last him a lifetime.

With his mouth set determinedly, he entered Hogwarts and made his way up to his dorm.

"Dray," he whispered fiercely.

Draco muttered a few disjointed words and rolled onto his back, his legs almost pushing Harry off his bed as he did so. Harry leaned over and shook him hard. When Draco's eyes opened and peered up at him, Harry relaxed slightly. Their silvery grey eased his nerves and settled his queasy stomach.

"I'm leaving now, Dray," he murmured, unable to take his eyes off Draco's.

Draco sighed, ran a hand over his face and snarled at him, "You're only making it harder on yourself, Potter."

Harry supposed it was to ease his heartache when the time came for him to leave, but Draco calling him Potter made his heart freeze in sadness. "Dray please..."

Draco swallowed, keeping his face impassive from all the pain he held inside. "Har," he began but Harry was already in his arms; gripping his waist as if they would never see each other again. They wouldn't see each other again.

Draco kissed his boyfriend's temple gently, hoping that the boy would find solace in his arms in a different life.

"You know," Harry said in a thick voice, "The day before I went back in time I was asked out by Zacharius Smith. The bastard thought I was gay and using Ginny as a deterrent." He snuffled, trying to hold back the tears that threatened. "When I told him I wasn't, he went to my house and let himself in, polyjuicing as Ginny so I would kiss him.

"I didn't even know I was gay. I thought I was fully in love with Ginny. I would have proposed to her if I hadn't gone back in time and found you." Draco whispered nonsense in his ear, rubbing Harry's back as he listened with horror to the mistake he could have made. "I was disgusted that Smith kissed me, disgusted that I had kissed a guy. I guess you could say I was sort of homophobic."

Draco kissed his jaw line, perhaps to remind him that he was no longer and beating himself up about it would do no good. Harry chuckled humourlessly, "I thought it was sick, something that was unnatural.

"But then I met you - here. It made me see that perhaps gay guys can find love too, that it's just the same as straight relationships. I found you and I kissed you and it made me feel spectacular, like Ginny never could. I want to stay right here with you and get married, adopt some kids and have a family. I want to get to know you as a husband and have a life together. I wish this was my original life, that I wasn't becoming the next Dark Lord, that we could be together. But we can't Dray, it's not right. I have to set everything to rights and make sure everything's okay. I can't live like this. I'm sorry."

He pressed another kiss, this time to Harry's nose as he stared into his tearful, green eyes. "I'm glad you understand," he said, voice barely audible above their breathing. "I'm glad you're doing what's right instead of what you want."

He kissed Harry's lips, feeling their warmth one last time before he let the boy go and pulled away, physically and emotionally. "Goodbye Harry Potter. Make everything right again, make me proud."

It was perhaps the best thing Draco could have said to him, the one true thing that would make him leave and not look back; all regrets firmly locked inside. And that's exactly what Harry done. He nodded once, tears falling despite himself and pulled out the time turner.

With one last sigh, he turned it back to Tom Riddle's time; back to stop himself from murdering the boy.


End file.
